--DELETED LINK--

#link--

The data sources clearly communicates the

production

of five different

energy

Suggestion

energies

(gas, coal, nuclear,

petro

Suggestion

Petro

petrol

patrol

and other) over the period of 10 years. Overall, while there was an upward trend in the

production

of almost

energy

except nuclear

energy

(

Accept space

(

Suggestion

downward trend could be seen in nuclear

energy

production

over the 10-year period. ) The only downward trend in the 2005's pie chart illustrates the decreasing of nuclear power in a decade. In 1995, around 29,80% coal

energy

is produced, followed by gas and

petro

Suggestion

petrol

energy

, which were 29,63% and 29,27% respectively. The figure for coal

energy

and gas

energy

slightly increased slightly to 30.93% and 30.31% respectively in the

ten years.

By contrast

petro

Suggestion

Petro

petrol

production

saw a significant decrease, from 29.27% in 1995 to 19.55% in 2005. Turning to the remaining

energy

productions, which are nuclear

energy

production

and other

energy

production

. Both of them were increased slightly, by about 4% and 3.5% individually.

Submitted by monikahuynh152 on Fri Apr 24 2020

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

157 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Fully explain your ideas

In some countries, the role of a mother differs in some ways from the role of a father. Why do you think these differences exist? How might parental roles develop in the future?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones.

Some people think that more money should be spent on protecting endangeret species while others think it is a waste of valuable money. What is your opinion?

Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on children. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.