Some people say that competitive sports have advantages for people from different groups and countries, while others believe that competitive sports only create problems between people. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
There is a growing debate among experts that disputes between
people
is
rising Correct subject-verb agreement
are
due to
competitive sports
while
others believe the benefits outweigh the disadvantages. I will discuss my view on both sides, but, in my opinion, competitive sports
should be considered as a game and nothing more.
One benefit of the
competitive Correct article usage
apply
sports
is that people
can be inspired by their favourite sportsmen. They can lead a determined and successful life by following principles
of their heroes. Correct article usage
the principles
For example
, India worships cricket as a religion because of Sachin Tendulkar, one of the great batsmen of his time. He inspired the whole country to participate in cricket and now, India has produced several great cricketers such
as Virat Kohli. Other benefits
of Fix the agreement mistake
Another benefit
such
an event are
that it brings Correct subject-verb agreement
is
people
of different regions or countries together in solidarity to enjoy the game.
Sometimes, people
get carried away in competitive sports
and take a loss or win personally. This
leads to offensive behaviour towards the opposing team. Many a times
, it can be seen in sport events that Correct the article-noun agreement
Many times
Many a time
people
feel frustrated when their team losses
and create Replace the word
loses
ruckus
. Add an article
a ruckus
For example
, whenever India and Pakistan have their matches, although
players may play it
professionally, the crowd can become charged up and harass each other’s country. Correct pronoun usage
apply
This
kind of behaviour can lead to an uproar among the people
such
as harming each other.
In conclusion, I believe competitive sports
are an excellent way to promote enjoyment and solidarity among people
of different cultures. We should realize that there will always be losers and winners in a game, but that should not create an environment of mass hysteria.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear thesis statement. It is important to clearly state your opinion at the beginning of the essay.
task achievement
The essay lacks specific supporting examples to illustrate the disadvantages of competitive sports.
coherence cohesion
The essay could benefit from a stronger conclusion that summarizes the main points and restates your opinion.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite