IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Many countries believe that international tourism has harmful effects. Why do they think so? What can be done to change their views?

#countries #tourism #effects #change
International
tourism
 has contributed enormously to the economy of many countries worldwide.
it’s
Suggestion
It’s
 believed to have some negative effects. The purpose of
this
 essay
is do discuss
Suggestion
discusses
 possible reasons and recommend some ways to
change
 the situation. The
development
 of multinational
tourism
has been raising
Suggestion
has raised
 people's concerns not only on
pollution but
Accept comma addition
pollution, but
also
 on the disappearance of local
culture
.
Firstly
, its undeniable that tourists are attracted by the beauty of desert islands,
villages in
Accept comma addition
villages, in
 tropical jungles, and the
development
 of
tourism
 in those places has harmed the nature because of garbage left my tourists.
Secondly
, locals are likely to establish new services, which conflict with their traditional customs, to earn their livelihood and to make tourists comfortable,
such
 as massage and karaoke services.
For example
, the island of Mykonos
,
Accept space
,
Greece. The uncontrolled and rapid
development
 of
tourism
 has led to a complete
change
 in the two traditional settlements of the island, which were merged with the newly formed villages, and turned into large-scale residential areas, which led to the degradation of the environment and local
culture
 and a
change
 in the
socio-economic
involving social as well as economic factors
socioeconomic
 structure. There are a few approaches to
change
 the negative views on
tourism
development
. Authorities in these tourist destinations should collaborate with locals in regulating their
tourism
development
.
Other
Suggestion
Another
 way is keeping the awareness of the preservation of traditional
culture
 is the most effective way to attract tourists, rather than non-traditional services used to adapt the needs of visitors.
For example
, the United States have a system of taxation of
pollution
, and
second
, a system of issuing quotas for the permissible level of
pollution
. Companies are mercilessly fined for exceeding
this
 level. In conclusion,
although
 there are many negative effects caused by an international
tourism
,
such
 as environmental
pollution
 and decreasing of native
culture
, lots of solutions could be implemented by locals and government to
change
 the negative views.
Submitted by bammesdilia24 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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