Nowadays people are spending more time away from their homes because they spend longer in their workplace. Write the advantages and disadvantages.

#people #time #homes #workplace

These days monthly people spending more

time

away from their

home

because they spend longer in their workplace. I will

discuss the both

Suggestion

discuss both the

advantages and disadvantages.

To begin

with, there are numerous

benefit

Suggestion

beneficial

when the people

are do

Suggestion

are doing

have done

the work away from

home

Accept space

first

preceding all others in time or space or degree

First

of all

Accept space

they can give more

time

in their office and enhance the

skill but

Accept comma addition

skill, but

stay

home

cannot achieve skills.

Furthermore

Accept space

they will be become independent in their life as well as

this

is more beneficial for

shapping

any process serving to define the shape of something

shaping

sapping

shopping

their career.

Moreover

, when they away from

home they

Accept comma addition

home, they

will mingle with other

people

Accept comma addition

people, therefore

people therefore

therfore

those can increase the experience about the business as well as get the promotion

therfore

(used to introduce a logical conclusion) from that fact or reason or as a result

therefore

they

are achieve

Suggestion

are achieving

have achieved

the worldly knowledge and understand the responsibilities their work

besides

, it is

greate impact

Suggestion

a great impact

great impact

greater impact

on the health when they away from

home

and

then

those

are do not give

Suggestion

are not given

aren't given

haven't given

proper attention on health

therfore

(used to introduce a logical conclusion) from that fact or reason or as a result

therefore

they

are consume

Suggestion

are consuming

are consumed

consume

unhealthy food

Accept space

apart

Suggestion

Apart

form

Accept space

it is

also

will be

impact

Suggestion

impacted

on bonding with family because when they will be

spend

Suggestion

spending

time

in their office and

then

will be gradually distance increase with their family members.

In addition

, these days each

people

Suggestion

person's

person

desire to earn

more money

Suggestion

more money, therefore

more money therefore

therfore

people have

hectic schedule

Suggestion

a hectic schedule

hectic schedules

. When they give more

time

same position in

job

Suggestion

a job

the job

in their office

this

is lead to medical problems,

such

as heart disease

Accept space

obesity

Accept space

blood pressure.

Suggestion

conclusion, it is true each

people

Suggestion

person

want earn more

money but

Accept comma addition

money, but

should be

distance

Suggestion

the distance

between professional and personal commitments

therfore

(used to introduce a logical conclusion) from that fact or reason or as a result

therefore

spend more

time

with family members

Accept space

the

Suggestion

The

disadvantage

outweigh

Suggestion

outweighs

this

advantage.

Submitted by sodhip03 on Sun Apr 26 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
36Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

262 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

career progression
earning potential
enhanced productivity
skill sets
work-life balance
personal well-being
negatively impacting
increased stress
health issues
burnout
cardiovascular diseases

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
The television is good for you. Discuss the advantage and disadvantage of watching television. Give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your experience.
People have different views about the benefits and drawbacks of watching TV. While there are some drawbacks to watching television, I believe that watching shows usually has more positive effects.
<4
band
There are more and more effective security measures in large cities to reduce the crime. Does this endeavor bring more benefits than problems?
Since the crime rate has increased in many cities some security actions are taken to control the amount of crimes which not only can it make cities much safer places but also it can reduce the amount of crimes; Therefore in my opinion security measures can be beneficial to control cities and make them much safer despite minor inconveniences they may cause.
4.5
band
Some people think that the environmental problems should be solved on a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. discuss both these views and give your own opinion. nb
Some people prefer to solve environmental problems on a global scale but other people think that it is better to deal each country on their own. Of course, it is better for each country to solve its own problems, but if it is a peaceful and serious problem, it is unlikely that it will be solved by itself. I believe that solving environmental problems on a global scale is better, because problem can be easily solved and unity among countries increases.
7
band
It is often suggested that schoolchildren should learn how to grow vegetables and keep animals. What are the advantages and disadvantages? Do you think that advantage of this outweigh the disadvantage?
People have different views as to whether primary schools should teach children how to cultivate plants and raise animals. While there are legitimate concerns surrounding time constraints, I believe this approach would do more good than harm when viewed through the lense of academic growth.
4.5
band
In many countries, people watch many foreign made television programs and Internet videos. The dominance of imported entertainment is harmful to the cultures of these countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Foreign made television programs and Internet videos are popular in many countries including Indonesia. Should they be banned in order to protect the local cultures of this country? I strongly agree with this view for a number of reasons.

Nowadays people are spending more time away from their homes because they spend longer in their workplace. Write the advantages and disadvantages.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The television is good for you. Discuss the advantage and disadvantage of watching television. Give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your experience.

There are more and more effective security measures in large cities to reduce the crime. Does this endeavor bring more benefits than problems?

Some people think that the environmental problems should be solved on a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. discuss both these views and give your own opinion. nb

It is often suggested that schoolchildren should learn how to grow vegetables and keep animals. What are the advantages and disadvantages? Do you think that advantage of this outweigh the disadvantage?

In many countries, people watch many foreign made television programs and Internet videos. The dominance of imported entertainment is harmful to the cultures of these countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?