IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The charts below show the reasons why people travel to work by bicycle or by car. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the reasons why people travel to work by bicycle or by car. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #people #travel #work #bicycle #car #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The first chart sheds light on why some
people
Use synonyms
 choose
Add an article
a bicycle
show examples
bicycle
Fix the agreement mistake
bicycles
show examples
 to travel to
work
Use synonyms
. Contrariwise, the
second
Linking Words
 chart gives
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information about the
reason
Use synonyms
 why they go to
work
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
car
Change preposition
by car
show examples
 . By and large,
people
Use synonyms
 who prefer bicycles to
work
Use synonyms
 are mostly concerned about fitness, health and population.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, comfort is the predominant
reason
Use synonyms
 why
people
Use synonyms
 use cars for travel to
work
Use synonyms
 . First and foremost, less than a
third
Linking Words
 of those who is riding a bike to
work
Use synonyms
 say that it’s good for their health and
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 them to stay in shape .
Besides
Linking Words
 , the same amount of
people
Use synonyms
 (30%)
give
Change the verb form
gives
show examples
 another
reason
Use synonyms
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
because
Replace the word
that
show examples
 it causes less exhaustion to the environment . Meanwhile , 15% of
people
Use synonyms
 insist that there is
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
 difficult to find a spot to park
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 bike , and the rest agree on it’s cheaper and faster than driving a
car
Use synonyms
. Simultaneously , the percentage of
people
Use synonyms
 who choose to travel by
cars
Fix the agreement mistake
car
show examples
 simply because it’s more comfortable is 40% . Travelling
long
Add an article
the long
show examples
distance
Fix the agreement mistake
distances
show examples
 from home to working place takes up to 21%
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the
reason
Use synonyms
 why we should drive a
car
Use synonyms
.
People
Use synonyms
 who have to get to
work
Use synonyms
 early and need to carry things to
work
Use synonyms
 are two reasons have the same amount of percentage
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
14%.
Last
Linking Words
 but not least , safety
reason
Use synonyms
 is why
people
Use synonyms
 need to go to
work
Use synonyms
 by
car
Use synonyms
 , which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
occupied 11% in total .

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Contractions: Don't use contractions.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, work, reason, car with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gives" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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