IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many processed foods and ready-meals contain preservatives and chemicals Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages ?

#foods #ready-meals #preservatives #chemicals
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Presently, there is an abundance of prepackaged foods and frozen entrees involve preservatives and chemicals for consumers to ingest.
This
Linking Words
 essay will that the underprivileged of
this
Linking Words
 outweigh the advantage. The essay will
first
Linking Words
 demonstrate the commodious to consume and preserve foods continuously, followed by an analysis of how prepackaged and frozen foods impair the consumer's health gradually. The main reason which consumers habitually consume prepackaged and ready-foods
is convenience in the purchase and ingest
Suggestion
ingests convenience in the purchase and
is convenience in the purchase and ingest
 them. Compared with other types of foods, repackaged
food
Use synonyms
 can be found anywhere, located in every fast-
food
Use synonyms
 chain, with an inexpensive cost.
Hence
Linking Words
, consumption is quicker and effortless. To illustrate, great
nations including
Accept comma addition
nations, including
 American, Britain, China, where the percentage of fast-
food
Use synonyms
 consumption per day is gigantic, approximately 58%, 46%, 60
% respectively
Accept comma addition
%, respectively
,
additionally
Linking Words
, the analysis light out the fact that every three adults, there is one ingest prepackaged
food
Use synonyms
 regularly.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, prepackaged and frozen
food
Use synonyms
 can preserve
continuously
Suggestion
continuity
. The seller can freeze the
food
Use synonyms
 continuously, protect
food
Use synonyms
 with preservatives to longer the
food
Use synonyms
's living, when it is necessary, microwave them, and prepare for the
next
Linking Words
 meal. The drawback to
this
Linking Words
 said that prepackaged and frozen
foods
Suggestion
food
 can impair health gradually. Many of report and statistics were recorded that consume prepackaged
food
Use synonyms
 is the main cause of a variety of dangerous
disease
Suggestion
diseases
 including cardiovascular disease, obesity, and cancer. It is said that in developed countries, every four adults, there are two who have heart failure, and every five children, there are two who have obesity at the
second
Linking Words
 level. On balance, the fact that prepackaged and frozen
food
Use synonyms
 impairs the consumer's health outweighs the advantage of
preserve
Suggestion
preserving
 and consume
food
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by vr.capcap on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: