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People today are not as fit as they were in the past. What are the causes of this? What can governments do to deal with this issue?

#people #governments
It has been observed that there is a significant decline in the
health
 of people as compared to
past
Suggestion
the past
.
This
 is mainly because people are unable to perform physical activities. There are
number
Suggestion
a number
 of solutions that should be implemented by the government to improve the
health
 and fitness of people. The reason why most of the people
are not fit
Suggestion
don't fit
 as they use to be in the past is due to their inability to perform physical activities.
That is
 to say, nowadays, people do not have enough time to take care of their physical
health
 because they work longer hours to support the basic needs of their family. On the top of that, they work in a pressure environment, which makes them tired and inactive.
As a result
, upon returning home, they prefer watching television to relax themselves,
instead
 of playing actual outdoor games. The most effective solution to unhealthy lifestyle is raising awareness among the people. One way to tackle
this
 is that government should organise
health
 awareness campaigns whose main aim is to educate people about the
health
 issues faced by unwell people.
This
 solution would hopefully encourage people to stay away from
health
 diseases by opting the habit of healthy eating along with performing outdoor activities
such
 as running, jogging and yoga. To conclude, I agree that in the modern
world people
Accept comma addition
world, people
 are not active as they were in the past due to their busy work schedule.
However
, government efforts,
such
 as, raising awareness about the
health
 issues can encourage people to follow
healthy lifestyle
Suggestion
a healthy lifestyle
healthy lifestyles
.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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