IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Many people today are worried about ‘cybercrime ’such as hacking and identity theft. What problems does ‘cybercrime’ cause, and what solutions can you suggest for ordinary people and businesses to take? Give reasons for your answer, and provide ideas and examples from your own experience.

#people #‘cybercrime #’such #identity #theft #‘cybercrime’ #businesses
Cyber crime is a cause of widespread concern today, as so many people use technology to store and transmit sensitive data. There are a number of problems that people suffer
as a result
 of these crimes, but
also
 some straightforward measures we can take to protect ourselves. Perhaps the worst problem stemming from
this
 is the financial impact. If someone has his or her bank account emptied, or has false credit lines created under their name, they are potentially liable for large sums of money. Even if they can avoid the consequences, their bank or finance company has to cover the losses, which can damage their performance.
Further problem
Suggestion
The further problem
 is the way in which these stolen funds are used to subsidize other crimes,
such
 as drug distribution or even terrorism. Once the money enters the criminal networks, we have no way of knowing how it will be used.
Finally
, there is the problem of anxiety and stress caused to the innocent victims of these crimes. The initial shock is often followed by months or years or legal wrangling, paperwork and a sense of insecurity. Turning to possible solutions, probably the most effective measure is to improve personal security, ranging from passwords to the shredding of documents.
This
 denies the criminals the raw materials to work with.
Secondly
, we should raise awareness of the risks among the elderly or the very young – two groups who are often specifically targeted – via publicity and public education. Ultimately,
however
, it is the financial companies who can make the greatest contribution, by increasing their security and detection systems – ideally in partnership with the police. Overall, the problems caused are both financial and social, and the solutions should involve coordinated action by individuals, corporations and the state.
Submitted by kamaldeepkaur45600 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • phishing
  • malware
  • ransomware
  • data breach
  • two-factor authentication
  • encryption
  • firewall
  • cybersecurity
  • identity theft
  • financial fraud
  • reputation management
  • vulnerabilities
  • patch management
  • cyber hygiene
  • regulatory compliance
What to do next:
Look at other essays: