The table below shows the worldwide market share of the notebook computer market for manufacturers in the years 2006 and 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the worldwide market share of the notebook computer market for manufacturers in the years 2006 and 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The table below shows the worldwide market share of the notebook computer market for manufacturers in the years 2006 and 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The table chart illustrates the number of
computer’s
Change noun form
computer

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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notebook
Fix the agreement mistake
notebooks

It seems that notebook may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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for makers in the global market in two different years
are
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb are appears to be unnecessary here.

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2006 and 2007.
Overall
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the percentage of HP’s computer
notebook
Fix the agreement mistake
notebooks

It seems that notebook may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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was
highest
Correct article usage
the highest

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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and there was
lowest
Change the article
the lowest

It appears that the phrase lowest proportion does not contain the correct article usage. Consider making a change.

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proportion of Fujitsu-Siemens during the show period.
Also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the amount of Market Share in HP, Dell and Toshiba increased, a
reverse
Replace the word
reversal

The word reverse doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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of the pattern was seen in the rest of
countries
Correct article usage
the countries

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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. In 2006, the amount of Market Share
in
Change preposition
apply

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HP was 31.4%, which was higher
about
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by about

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13.8% than that of Dell. In the
next
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

year, both the figures
were
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb were appears to be unnecessary here.

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increased slightly at around 34% and 20.2% respectively. At the same time, the figure for Toshiba rose from 6.2% to 7.3%.
It is clear that
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

there are four countries that climbed down about
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

type. By 2006, the figure for Acer was 11.6, which higher
5
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than 5

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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%
than
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for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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Lenovo and the following
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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year both of them drop
at
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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10.7% and 6.2%.
Additionally
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, Fujitsu and
others company
Fix the agreement mistake
other companies

It seems that others company may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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decreased significantly
about
Change preposition
by about

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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2.5% and 3.5 respectively.

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • market share
  • percentage points
  • market presence
  • ranking
  • market leader
  • least market share
  • total market share
  • market consolidation
  • market diversification
  • new entrants
  • exits
  • highlight
  • compare
  • decline
  • increase
  • improvement
  • loss of ground
  • manufacturer
  • worldwide
  • notebook computer
  • notable
  • significant
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