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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Nowadays, entertainers get paid more than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is this a negative or positive development? To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#entertainers #politicians #development
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In our days no can deny
this
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 fact that showmen’s get a higher salary than people in politics. There are several reasons, the main reason that people prefer to
spent
Suggestion
spend
 time by watching movies, listening to music, enjoying good performances
instead
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 of monitor domestic or civics problems.
Definitely I
Accept comma addition
Definitely, I
 absolutely agree with
this
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 statement. On the one hand, with developing technological resources like TV, Smartphone’s, Internet, people watch more TV shows, concerts, films.
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Furthermore artists
Accept comma addition
Furthermore, artists
, singers,
snowmakers
Suggestion
 try to do more interesting projects to catch attention of clients,
consequently
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 have earned every browsing by viewers.
For example
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, the most popular singer and actress Jennifer Lopes made a film “Hustlers”
last
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 year and earned 20 million dollars, continues to do it every time when somebody watch
this
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 film by internet. As for
politicians most
Accept comma addition
politicians, most
 of their lives on monthly income without extra paid.
On the other hand
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, most of showmen are active internet users, they often create pages on social media
such
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 as Facebook, Instagram, Twitter
,
Accept space
,
 in order to promote
different type
Suggestion
different types
 of products like a clothes, meals, cosmetics and get an additional earnings from companies
besides
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 the main income. Unfortunately for politicians any extra payment accepted like a corruption. To conclude
,
Accept space
,
 nowadays, majority preference of people has been
a
Suggestion
an
 entertainment,
therefore
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 entertainers have been paid more than politicians.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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