Some people say that spending time to develop a successful career is the most important thing. Others say that spending time with friends and family is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #time #career #friends

It is believed by a few individuals that investing

time

for developing a successful career is a major part of

life

, while others thinks that spending

time

with family and friends is more

neccessary

absolutely essential

necessary

. I profoundly agree with the former statement,

however both

Accept comma addition

however, both

statements are having their own importance. Today’s in

contempary era

Suggestion

the contemporary era

contemporary era

, there is a big completion to get success and financially strong in career and for the same reason the ones has to pay the cost, by spending less

time

with family and friends to achieve the

luxguries

Suggestion

luxury

luxuries

lifestyle.

On the other hand

, it is

also

very important to spend

time

family and friends to make the relationship

more strong

Suggestion

stronger

and provide proper

time

to children so that they won’t feel

isolate

Suggestion

isolated

life

, as family plays the vital role to reduce stress of work. To conclude

this

both the aspects are equally

essanial

absolutely necessary; vitally necessary

essential

to sustain a successful

life

as family and friends are the one to boost us and to reach of the principle of success along with the set goal for our

life

which is highly required with

the good

Suggestion

the best

lifestyle.

Wed May 06 2020

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

185 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say that spending time to develop a successful career is the most important thing. Others say that spending time with friends and family is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?

Some people claim that it is acceptable to use animals in medical research for the benefit of human beings, while other people argue that it is wrong. Discuss both views and give your opinion

In some pleces old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. discuss both views and give your opinion.

More and more people in developing countries are purchasing cars for the first time. What problems does this cause? What do you think is a possible solution?

As the number of cars increases, more money has to be spent on road systems. Some people think the government should pay for this. Others, however, think that drivers should cover the costs. Discuss both views and give your opinion.