Some parents are worried about the increasing level of violence in TV, videos games & other types of entertainment for children's leisure. How does this affect children? How do you think problem can be tackled?

Children’s free time have been predominantly occupied by violent entertainments, so parents are much concerned about
this
trend.
This
essay will discuss about the impacts on children's behaviour and solutions to mitigate those problems.
To begin
with, kids behaviour is immensely impacted due to the exposure to violence.
Firstly
, they have become short tempered
in
Suggestion
with
such
a young age and
as a result
, the ability to handle a failure situation become impossible.
For example
, a recent news came to lime light where a student carried
gun
Suggestion
guns
to his school on a motive to kill his teacher and other rampage attempts are
also
clearly evident in
recent past
Suggestion
the recent past
.
Secondly
, more negativities
being implanted
Suggestion
been implanted
in
children’s mind
Suggestion
the child’s mind
child’s mind
a child’s mind
, eventually put their future in jeopardy. The above effects can be greatly reduced by diverting their leisure time to more outdoor activities.
In other words
, parents should encourage their kids into some sport activities, which has
two-fold
benefits.
firstly
Suggestion
Firstly
, the amount of time spending on unwanted entertainment will be greatly reduced.
Secondly
,
being
have the quality of being; (copula, used with an adjective or a predicate noun)
been
actively involved in sports will undoubtedly increase their physical and mental health.
For example
, a recent study suggests that involvement in sport activities alters the behaviour of humans in a positive way. In conclusion, though violent entertainment mediums have potential impact on
children
Suggestion
child's
children's
future growth, there are ways by which it can be completely eradicated.
Submitted by rajeshr1988 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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