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Some people think it is more important to spend time in developing a successful career while others think it is more important to spend time with friends and family. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

#people #time #career #friends
While some people consider establishing professional growth is about more vitality, others disagree; highlighting our social connections should be the main concern.
However
, in my opinion, both are equally important for a happy heart. Admittedly, putting
time
 and effort towards a career growth results in more favourable outcomes.
Firstly
, in
this
 competitive marketing world, in order to reach your desired status, not only you have to work continuously, but you
also
 have to be willing to make constant sacrifices along the way, including family point.
For instance
, a majority of the medical graduates globally attend multiple seminars, pursue specializations and work in different hospitals, irrespective of the
time
 period, to be able to stay atop of their professional field;
this
 in turn can benefit them via gaining their popularity or a higher position.
Secondly
, a good job is a source of an income for a family; maintaining financial security. To illustrate, nowadays, private schools for children with a number of extra-curricular activities, all come at a very expensive cost; which could only be financed if a parent is in a well-established occupation.
On the other hand
, others disagree, emphasising that happiness isn’t always fulfilled by monetary materials/values.
Furthermore
, every stage of life, not only carries
it’s
of a thing, of it; possessive form of "it"
its
 own unique
memories but
Accept comma addition
memories, but
 it’s
also
 non-repeatable.
For instance
, a workaholic might miss his son’s birth or his daughter’s ballet rehearsal, which are all once in a
life
the period during which something is functional (as between birth and death)
lifetime
time
 kind of experience, that can’t be returned, yet only regretted looking back.
Finally
, spending
time
 with relatives and peers increases one’s social intelligence, which is an important quality
besides
 academic and practical intelligence, to be able to climb the professional ladder. In conclusion, I believe neither of them is more important than the other, yet both are equally vital
,
Accept space
,
 as long as an individual learns to balance his personal and work life.
Submitted by papillon_lilas on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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