Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that schools is the place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Undoubtedly, childre
n’s
Suggestion
the children’s
upbringing
is one of the most controversial item in every
society
. It is often argued that children’s breading for being an excellent person in
communi
ty, stem
Suggestion
the community
from eighter
parent
after a negative statement used as an intensive meaning something like 'likewise' or 'also'
either
s or
school
. In my opinion parents have a lauded
role
in children’s
upbringing
. In turn,
this
essay will discuss the effects of parents and
school
on children’s behavio
r.
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
On the one hand,
school
is a place to teach to younger generation how they should treat in
society
. As children usually spend a
third
of their time in
school
, so it has a critical effects
on the
Suggestion
effect
ir treatment. Because teachers and classmates known as a
role
model in children’s life,
therefore
passing time with variety
of cul
Suggestion
a variety
the variety
ture
impres
Suggestion
cultures
s on children’s
upbringing
.
For example
it has be
Accept comma addition
example, it
en proven by scienti
st that m
Suggestion
science
scientific
ajorit
y of chi
Suggestion
the majority
ldren who have gone to
school
, become an efficient person in
communi
ty rather
Suggestion
the community
than children’s who did not go. In my view
school
is one of the most effective place teaching children how to behave in
society
. To sum up,
school
has a
Suggestion
the school
positive effects
on
Suggestion
effect
communi
ty.
Suggestion
the community
On the other hand
, parents play a significant
role
in children’s
upbringing
. Before children go to
school
they spend most of their time with their family, and as childre
n person
Suggestion
children's
ality is formed by the age of 7,
therefore
parent’
s treatments, relat
Suggestion
the parent’s treatments
ionship,
upbringing
and many more is an i
mp
Suggestion
are
ortant item that effect on children’s behavio
r.
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
For instanc
e recent resear
Accept comma addition
instance, recent
ches show that most children living with their parents are an excellent member of
society
rather than children who deprive of parents. I believe that the most important factor on chil
dr
Suggestion
in
en’s
upbringing
depend on their parent’s behavio
r. To ta
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
ke every t
hing in con
all things
everything
s
id
Suggestion
into
eration, good member of
society
is the result of parent’s effort. In conclusion, it is clear that both parents and
school
have vital d
uty to del
Suggestion
a vital duty
iver a nice person to
community
. For the reasons mentioned above parent’s
role
is most im
portant than
Suggestion
more important
school
to children’s breading. Eventually to have a better
society
, children’s
upbringing
must be conside
r as a c
Suggestion
considered
ritical topic in these days.

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Moral compass
  • Ethical paradigms
  • Cultural mores
  • Civic duties
  • Socialization
  • Interpersonal skills
  • Pedagogical approaches
  • Value systems
  • Cohesive society
  • Formative years
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