IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Establishing good relationship in the workplace is not important, as the primary goal of every person is to focus on work. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#relationship #workplace #person #focus #work
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It is commonly believed that your priority in
Use synonyms
workplace
Suggestion
the workplace
a workplace
workplaces
 should be focusing on your duties at
work
Use synonyms
 rather than spend your time in order to establish friendships with your colleagues.
personally
Suggestion
Personally
, I assume that people can hardly
work
Use synonyms
 in
solitude and
Accept comma addition
solitude, and
 it is crucial for us to maintain good relations with our co-workers. To commence with, there are several compelling reasons why we need relationship-centric organizations. In detail, warm relationships in
Use synonyms
workplace
Suggestion
the workplace
is
Suggestion
are
top driver
Suggestion
top drivers
a top driver
for
Suggestion
of
 job satisfaction and employee engagement. Once there are positive social interactions between peers, productivity will be improved and prosocial
behaviors
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviours
 like collaboration occur.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, employee interactions lead to better teamwork among co-workers and People who get closer to their colleagues perform better than their solitary peers.
Therefore
Linking Words
, companies
benefits
Suggestion
benefit
 from productive workforce. Having said
this
Linking Words
, psychologists have illustrated that interpersonal relations at
work
Use synonyms
 have positive effects on employees as people spend most of their time at
work
Use synonyms
 and it is essential for their mental health to forge friendships in the office. Indeed, a significant factor to
workplace
Use synonyms
 stress is lack of social bonds between employees.
Longterm
Suggestion
Long term
 exposure to irritable
behavior
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
 in the office cause several psychiatric disorders.
Linking Words
as
Suggestion
As
 a
result people
Accept comma addition
result, people
 need to feel connected and supported by their peers.
Moreover
Linking Words
, individuals need to be on good terms with their colleagues because connecting with other people is considered as a basic human need. In conclusion, it seems to me that as human beings and with the need of communication, it is essential for us to create a friendly atmosphere at the
workplace
Use synonyms
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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