IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In many countries, students do not want to study science subjects at university. Why is this happening? What will be the consequences of this for society?

#countries #students #study #science #subjects #university #consequences #society
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#writing_correction38
Due to
Linking Words
science
Use synonyms
subjects
Use synonyms
do
Verb problem
apply
show examples
not
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
stimulant
Correct article usage
a stimulant
show examples
 for students to study
this
Linking Words
 part of lessons in university;
thus
Linking Words
 , in most nations will be
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
economic problems in society. The first
reveals
Wrong verb form
revealed
show examples
 cause for not studying
science
Use synonyms
 subject is
shortage
Correct article usage
a shortage
show examples
 tendency. Owing
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
students will not have a basic security job
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the future. Take
Add the comma(s)
,
show examples
for instance
Linking Words
 , a recent
graduated
Change the form of the verb
graduate
show examples
 in
this
Linking Words
 field
fail
Correct subject-verb agreement
fails
show examples
 to find their vocation.
Then
Linking Words
 , it is a stronger reason to do, not focus on these
subjects
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
 , that able to remarked is difficult to quite understand
science
Use synonyms
subjects
Use synonyms
. It is,
however
Linking Words
 , necessary
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 most part of skills,
knowledges
Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
show examples
 and some doing on routine days.
Then
Linking Words
 , if they waste the time
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
learning and choosing another subject, the myriad of students are getting the best job and finding a more comfortable situation in their societies. There is ample
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
evidence that disregarded
science
Use synonyms
subjects
Use synonyms
 influenced
economic
Correct article usage
the economic
show examples
 development
a
Change preposition
of a
show examples
society. Not only does it bring economic stagnation, but it
also
Linking Words
 depends on the other
countries
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
 , chemistry
subjects
Use synonyms
 can help in making medicines and it reduces the cost of it in each country.
Therefore
Linking Words
 , not
possess
Wrong verb form
possessing
show examples
 notice about
this
Linking Words
 subject does have a negative point
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
 and it has a bad effect because it's becoming less youth versatile workforce related to
this
Linking Words
 job. Despite avoiding creating special opportunities in
Correct article usage
the economic
show examples
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
 it likely has few economic losses.
To conclude
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 essay, is the motivational element that stopped
to continue
Verb problem
me
show examples
to take in
Change preposition
from taking
show examples
science
Use synonyms
subjects
Use synonyms
 in several
countries
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
 , in most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
countries
Add an article
the countries
show examples
, these
relevant
Add a missing verb
are relevant
show examples
 to
serious
Add an article
the serious
show examples
consequence
Fix the agreement mistake
consequences
show examples
 of
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
show examples
 in a society. #writing_correction38
Submitted by salarrafati on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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