IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people, while others believe that the purpose of museums is to educate. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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People have different views about the role of museums in society. Some of them think that museums are the places where people should be educated, while others opine that they should be enjoyable.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 education tends to play a larger part, I believe museums can serve equal purposes. On the one side of the argument, it is argued that the museums should focus on entertaining.
Firstly
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, museums are considered to be tourist attractions where interesting objects can be displayed that many individuals want to see. Should people listen or read too much educational content, they may become bored,
thus
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.
museums go
Accept comma addition
museums, go
 to the extra miles to teach them in an enjoyable way
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 as organizing games.
Secondly
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, most of the museums have free entrances, so they have to balance their budget.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, if they operate more activities to attract many visitors, they would get an additional entry fee to cover costs. On the other side of the argument, education has a radical role to be paid attention by museums. There is to say that the aim any collected exhibition should be to inform people with what they did not know before.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 means staff members working in the museums need to explain all the
artifacts
a man-made object taken as a whole
artefacts
 or sculptures in detail,
moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 headsets are provided for whom detailed commentaries are given about
exhibition
Suggestion
the exhibition
.
In other words
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, there are people who are interested in different fields of history.
Hence
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, museums invite specialists to give a speech about the
archeology
the branch of anthropology that studies prehistoric people and their cultures
archaeology
ecology
 or historical jewellery which is informative as well. In conclusion, it seems to me that museums should be both educational and entertaining where people can acquire any information in an enjoyable way.

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