IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many people join distance‐learning programs (study material, post, TV, Internet) and study at home, but some people think that it cannot bring the same benefit as attending colleges or universities does. Do you agree or disagree?

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Some people think
distance
Use synonyms
 learning from home is effective for the students as attending
school
Use synonyms
 or universities, while other people have opposite view of it.
This
Linking Words
 essay will agree that they
both
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 have their own benefits and
both
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 studying assists children to learn well for their career goal. On one hand,
distance
Use synonyms
study
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 makes the
learner easy
Accept comma addition
learner, easy
 to attend class at their schedule. Even though they are ill or not became able to go to
school
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, it does not matter as they can conveniently attend class online from home bed.
That
Suggestion
That's
 why, it's assist children to be regular at
study
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 at any difficult
time
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.
For instance
Linking Words
,
last
Linking Words
 year I was sick so I was not
woory
afflicted with or marked by anxious uneasiness or trouble or grief
worried
 about the
attendance nor
Accept comma addition
attendance, nor
 about
study
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 because I was able to attend class online so no gap in my
study
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.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it's
save
Suggestion
saved
 the
time
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 if one has to go to work as well. Even more, if they have online
study
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,
then
Linking Words
 they will not have
hectic life
Suggestion
hectic lives
a hectic life
 and manage
time
Use synonyms
 easily for
study
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. They don't need to rush and it's
save
Suggestion
saved
time
Use synonyms
 as well as energy.
In addition
Linking Words
,
distance
Use synonyms
 learning is always cheaper
Linking Words
then
conjunction used in comparatives
than
 attending
school
Use synonyms
. So anyone with low budget can develop their career by online
study
Use synonyms
. On
other hand
Suggestion
the other hand
, some people ponder
distance
Use synonyms
 learning cannot provide same pros as attending
school
Use synonyms
 and university. It might be because they think there will not be direct
face
Use synonyms
 to
face
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 communication between teacher and student which can become
obstacle
Suggestion
an obstacle
 to develop
mutual relationship
Suggestion
mutual relationships
a mutual relationship
 between them. Even though, they
study
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 very well by online, there will be
dearth
Suggestion
a dearth
 of
peers
Suggestion
peer
study
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 which impact on their interpersonal skill. For examples, if children
study
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 in
school
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 they talk with their friends and teacher
face
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 to
face
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 and they build up their confidence and eradicate their nervousness while speaking
infront
Suggestion
in front
 of anyone.
Linking Words
However I
Accept comma addition
However, I
 believe
both
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
study
Suggestion
studies
 have their own value and they
both
Use synonyms
 assist
student
Suggestion
the student
 in different ways. But, the common benefits
is
Suggestion
are
both
Use synonyms
 helps
student
Suggestion
students
the student
 to learn and to build up their future. To conclude,
distance
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 learning and
school
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 or college attending learning
both
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 main goal is to provide education to the toddlers and makes them successful in life.
Hence
Linking Words
, they
both
Use synonyms
 have varieties of
benefit but
Accept comma addition
benefit, but
goal
Suggestion
the goal
 is same.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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