These days many families move to other countries for work. Some people believe that the children in these families benefit from this move. However, others believe that it makes life more difficult for the children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Today numerous
Accept comma addition
Today, numerous
people go abroad with their family members in
order
to find a job. Some hold the opinion that
this
movement brings advantages to children while others argue that it is burdensome to adapt to
new environment
Suggestion
new environments
the new environment
a new environment
. Personally, I agree with the latter view that children come across a lot of difficulties when they go to foreign countries. Supporters of
former view
Suggestion
the former view
claim that children are more likely to be able to integrate.
In other words
, when children spend time among the people who are familiar to them, it is difficult to meet new persons. But they are subject to talk and contact strangers in
order
to ask something or get help in other countries.
For instance
, in the case that, children go to shopping without
parents they
Accept comma addition
parents, they
have to maintain contact with retailers which leads to conversations. They,
on the other hand
, have a big chance of gaining a higher level of educational qualifications. To illustrate, after
finish
Suggestion
finishing
university most students prefer to continue their education abroad in
order
to improve
themselves whereas
Accept comma addition
themselves, whereas
to live overseas gives
this
opportunity to children from childhood.
Therefore
, for these people going abroad has a lot of advantages.
However
, I share the view of those who believe that
cons
Suggestion
the cons
of moving abroad outweigh pros.
First
and foremost, the key factor that makes children upset is culture shock. Generally speaking, children face new cultures, customs and traditions are unknown
for
Suggestion
to
them and to assimilate all these varieties, as well as new peoples belonging to different nationalities are extremely difficult for children.
In addition
, to learn new
language
takes a lot of time and until managing to speak in that
language
children
Suggestion
child
suffer from talking to others which leads to being introvert and unsociable in the future.
For instance
, they can’t go outside without parents in
order
to buy something which is necessary for them. Even to play with other children is
also
impossible providing that they learn their mother
language
.
As a result
, they feel isolated and solitary. Before learning
language
Suggestion
the language
and culture of
other
any of various alternatives; some other
another
country to move there
thus
is arduous. To sum up, it can be advantageous migrate to foreign countries, but considering culture shock and foreign
language
that children have no information about, people must think about their children before moving,
Submitted by myburberry11 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

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‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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