If a product is good or it meets people will buy it. So, advertisement is unnecessary and no more than entertainment. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#product #people #advertisement #entertainment

In the

morden

belonging to the modern era; since the Middle Ages

modern

modem

world,

Suggestion

is very important to sell the product because these days, most of people are exposed to tv, computer or phone. So I believe that

Suggestion

is necessary

firmly

Accept comma addition

firmly, although

although

a product is very nice and there are some people who will buy. In

this

essay, I will suggest about the reasons that the companies have to advertise their products.

First

of all, the main reason that they need to make

Suggestion

about their items is because their items can be exposed to the people’s life. It will make more people know about them and introduce many benefits which people didn’t know previously.

Hence

, more people will purchase them than when there is no

Secondly

, it can build up the trust of the

company

. If the products are very

useful

Suggestion

usefully

and good

Suggestion

for

our society, the

company

will be able to make their trust to people. And

this

situation

can leads

Suggestion

can lead

to the consumption of

people

Suggestion

the people

For example

, people buy the stuff of the

company

that has higher trust. In conclusion, it might be stated that the effects of the

are huge

Suggestion

for

us,

therefore

Accept comma addition

therefore, although

although

Suggestion

item is nice and there are some consumers, the

company

has to make advertisements about their products.

Submitted by bjsean on Wed May 20 2020

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

213 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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If a product is good or it meets people will buy it. So, advertisement is unnecessary and no more than entertainment. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Fully explain your ideas

Topic: When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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