IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Some people say international sports events help in world peace. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #sports #events #world #peace
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Peaceful environment is considered as v
ital achievement
Suggestion
a vital achievement
of mankind and states itself. Peace is seen as societal friendship between people. As stress m
ake
Suggestion
makes
h
uman kind
all of the living human inhabitants of the earth
humankind
sick and feeble, it
also
Linking Words
 wreaks havoc in s
tates.
Suggestion
the states
That is
Linking Words
 why nations try to make peace in all cases. Most people reckon that international sport games play v
ast role
Suggestion
a vast role
in achieving world peace.
This
Linking Words
 is inevitable fact that sharing same thing makes people closer and organizing a lot of various kinds of international sports make people travelling many countries and sharing a lot of s
ame things.
Suggestion
the same things
 They acquaint with many people in different nationality and be friends with them.
As a result
Linking Words
 friendship leads to peaceful aura in s
tates.
Suggestion
the states
 Another goal for p
eaceful environment
Suggestion
the peaceful environment
between nations by international sports games is that it unites a lot of different kinds of nationality by using s
ame instructions
Suggestion
the same instructions
for the game they play with. They u
nites
Suggestion
unite
are uniting
have united
in one hand and fight together. As well as sportsmen come to the countries to play their role
,
Accept space
,
their bystanders
also
Linking Words
 travel to support their own team.
This
Linking Words
also
Linking Words
 helps improving relations between people in different nations
Submitted by narmin422 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: