IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Most people agree that money cannot be happiness. Why is happiness difficult to define? How can people achieve happiness?

#people #money #happiness
Happiness is equated with feeling pleasure or contentment. Most people believe that money cannot be related
to create
Suggestion
to creating
 joy in life. The
first
 half of the essay will discuss why it is hard to describe happiness and the ways to be happy will be explained in the latter. The main reason why ecstasy cannot be described easily is because it differs from
one
 person to another. Each individual has their own definition of exuberance according to their needs. Eating a candy might be overwhelming to a
child whereas,
Suggestion
child, whereas
 owning a dream car would cheer an adult which can be considered as an illustration to elucidate the fact that indeed happiness varies from an individual to
other
any of various alternatives; some other
another
.
As a result
,
this
 emotional feeling
do not have
Suggestion
does not have
 a determined form in order to describe. There are several methods to achieve happiness.
However
, the most efficient
one
 is to be content with what
one
 has. Most people are following someone else footsteps to be rich and happy while forgetting the fact that they are not blissful in their life. Having a harmony in the family and living a peaceful life is enough to be cheerful for most individuals. It is significant to find heaven in little things and count the blessings
one
 already has. Clearly, to attain once the person realises
their
people in general
they
 true blessings. In conclusion, being happy is a positive emotional state which is hard to determine as it is not same for everyone.
In contrast
, the feeling of elation can be accomplished by being content in whatever an individual owns.
Submitted by vijayaielts14 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: