IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

The bar chart shows the percentage of young people in higher education in 2000, 2005 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart shows the percentage of young people in higher education in 2000, 2005 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#bar #percentage #people #education #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The chart compares the ratio of young
people
 in 4 countries who entered higher training from 2000 to 2010.
Overall
, the participation rate of young
people
 studying higher
discipline
Fix the agreement mistake
disciplines
show examples
 was on the increase in these countries, with the exception of
country
 B.
In addition
, going into higher
education
 among young
people
 in
country
 D was more popular than those in other countries. In 2000, 60% of young
people
 in
country
 D participated in university
education
while
 the percentage of those in
country
 C coming to university was 10% lower. The participation rate of young
people
 in tertiary
education
 in
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
 A and B was lowest at 40%. In the
next
 10 years, the percentage of young
people
 participating in higher
education
 in
country
 D increased suddenly to 80%
while
 a gradual increase of 20% was seen in the figure for
country
 A.
In contrast
, the participation rate of young
people
 in higher
education
 in
country
 C just grew slightly to over 50% in 2010
whereas
 there was no change in the percentage of students among young
people
 in
country
 B at 40% during the given period.
Submitted by Bui Quyen on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, country, education with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: