IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

In many countries today there are many highly qualified graduates without employment. What factors may have caused this situation and what, in your opinion, can/should be done about it?

#countries #graduates #employment #factors #situation
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SOME PARENTES ENTICE THEIR CHILDREN TO GO TO THE UNIVERSITY JUST AFTER THE MIDDLE SCHOOL IN ORDER TO BUILD A CAREER QUICKLY. THEY BELIEVE THAT,
THIS
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 PATH IS THE ONLY WAY TO HAVE A GREAT JOB. IN THE
LAST
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 20 YEARS IT HAS CHANGED. MANY GRADUATES ARE HOLDING THEIR DEGREES WITHOUT HAVING A JOB. WHY DO YOU THINK IT IS HAPPENING? IN MY VIEW A VARIETY OF COMPANIES ARE REQUIRING MORE THAN A DEGREE AND NEW GRADUATES ARE NOT WELL- PREPARED.
FIRST
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 OF ALL, BEING A PROFESSIONAL IN A SPECIFIC FIELD IS NOT ENOUGH TO BE EMPLOYED. A PLETHORA OF COMPANIES ARE SEEKING FOR OTHERS ABILITIES RATHER THAN A CERTIFICATE. SOME THOSE ABILITIES ARE NOT ENCOUNTER IN A UNIVERSITY, THEY ARE
SUCH
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 AS A GIFT. THEY ARE SOLVING DIFFERENT TYPES OF PROBLEMS, BEING CHARISMATIC, AND ACCEPTING NEW FUNCTIONS. THE IMPORTANCE OF THOSE ARE NOT TEACHEABLE AT SCHOOL.
MOREOVER
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, THEY ARE EXTREMALLY NECESSARY IN THE WORK FORCE. IF YOU HAVE A CERTIFICATE, IT DOES NOT MEAN, YOU WILL HAVE ALL OF THEM.
ON THE OTHER HAND
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, SOME FRESH PROFESSIONALS ARE NOT WELL-PREPARED TO ACCEPT A SIMPLE JOB WITH LOWER SALARY THAN THE AVERAGE TO THAT POSITION. EVENTHOUGH THEY HAVE SUFICIENT KNOWLEDGE TO WORK IN A WEEL KNOWN COMPANY, THEY ARE NOT EXPERIENCED. IF THE COMPANY DO NOT HIRE THEM, THEY WILL NEVER PROOVE THAT, THEY ARE ABLE TO DO THEIR WORK.
IN ADDITION
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 TO
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THIS THEY
Accept comma addition
THIS, THEY
 HAVE MORE SKILLS THAN THE RESUME HAS SHOWN.
ALTHOUGH
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 THEY WOULD THINK, THEY DESERVE BETTER BENEFITS AND INCOME. SOMETIMES IS REQUIRED TO GO DOWN, TO GO UP.
IN OTHER WORDS
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, IF A PROFESSIONAL HAS BEEN STTRUGLING TO BE EMPLOYED, THEY MUST ACCEPT ANY OPPORTUNITY OF WORKING, EVEN THAT WITH POOR BENEFITS. IN CONCLUSION, SOME PEOPLE HAVE BEEN STRIVING TO BE EMPLOYED SINCE THE
LAST
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 TWO DECADES IN ALL OF THE WORLD DESPITE OF HAVING A DEGREE. THE COMPANIES ARE CHOOSY AND THE FRESH GRADUATES ARE NOT PREPARED TO GO OVER
THIS
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 SITUATION.
Submitted by janainasferreira14 on

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