some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that develop the mind such as reading and doing crossword puzzles others feel that it is important to give one’s mind a rest in leisure time. Discuss.

To start with, as we all are human we obviously should have a rest on recreation
time
to get out the stress of work and everyday life.
Also
on the other
side we
Accept comma addition
side, we
need to do some essential and beneficial tasks that we have not finished yet
also
for
Suggestion
to
stay healthy we have to do
physically
Suggestion
physical
exercises.
Actually nobody
Accept comma addition
Actually, nobody
can say what is the best
.
Accept space
.
we
Suggestion
We
will discuss both sites in
this
essay,
First
of all It is known that individuals want to relax after their
day
of hard work, they may relax
by
Suggestion
with
some interesting things
such
as watching films or playing a computer game, partially these activities are useful but all of them bring laziness to people. It is considered that it is wasting the expensive unmatched
time
, the extra important point is that the person is getting fatter
day
by
day
, the inactivity may bring people a dangerous
sicknesses
Suggestion
sickness
. On the completely other side, in our society the most people prefer to choose to be more active in their leisure period the cause they do very sitting
jobs
Accept comma addition
jobs, for
for
instance individuals
Accept comma addition
instance, individuals
many spend all
day
sitting on a chair without breaking and they are busy bee with doing their own works
,
Accept space
,
at the and a working the maybe have a backache and all of their body become tired so in
this
time
they need to improve health and collect the energy by doing some activity
such
as going to gym swimming and
also
going to play football. In the nutshell in my perspective the wrong way is to remain at home in your free
time
if you
have fully sitting
Suggestion
have fully been sitting
are fully sitting
were fully sitting
have fully sat
were fully sat
work, the most vital thing is that people want to stay healthy by choosing what is the best for themselves.
Submitted by Uralbek Begmatov on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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