IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviour. Others disagrees and think that the host country should welcome culture differences. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

#people #visitors #countries #customs #behaviour #host #country #culture #differences
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It is often
debatable
Suggestion
debated
 whether tourists should follow local customs and behaviour or
country
Use synonyms
 should be acceptable to
culture
Use synonyms
 differences. From my point of view both habitants and visitors should respect each other and avoid situations which could lead to some tensions, disrespect or conflicts.
This
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 essay has tried to cover both of views and will suggest a solution for
this
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 hot-button issue.
First
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 group who
argue
Suggestion
argues
 that visitors have to follow
traditions
Suggestion
the traditions
 of the
host
Use synonyms
country
Use synonyms
 believe that introducing of foreign
culture
Use synonyms
 can have serious consequences for the local people
.
Accept space
.
For example
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, in Islamic countries wearing a revealing dress or displaying emotions in public
such
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 as love, kissing will be considered as disrespect of
Use synonyms
country
Accept comma addition
country, culture
culture
Use synonyms
 due to
such
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 behaviour will have influence on personal development of indigenous people and
thus
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 will
distroy
do away with, cause the destruction or undoing of
destroy
 some local customs in the future. I believe
this
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actions
Suggestion
action
 can be avoided by tourists without effort. But the other group of people argue that
host
Use synonyms
country
Use synonyms
 should welcome
culture
Use synonyms
 differences and there are two good reasons for that.
Firstly
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,
other
any of various alternatives; some other
another
culture
Use synonyms
 can learn local people new things and it can be helpful. Indigenous people can use the advantage of new
culture
Use synonyms
 and
impact
Suggestion
the impact
 it on their own.
For example
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,
japanese
of or relating to or characteristic of Japan or its people or their culture or language
Japanese
 food is very popular in many countries and many restaurants of special foods are opened by local people.
Secondly
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, it is really hard for travellers to follow local customs and behaviour because they are totally different and
therefore
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 they are not able to adapt to the local traditions. If indigenous people welcome tourists'
culture
Use synonyms
, they will visit the
country
Use synonyms
 again. Correspondingly, the economy of
Use synonyms
host
Suggestion
the host country
country
Use synonyms
 will be increased. In conclusion, I believe that most of
tourists
Suggestion
the tourists
 are conscious and are able to understand some significant rules in
host
Use synonyms
country
Use synonyms
 and follow them as well as many indigenous people can respect
other foreign
Suggestion
the other foreign culture
culture
Use synonyms
 and both of sides will avoid conflicts and
become benefit to
Suggestion
become a benefit to
 each other.
Submitted by Ruzana Meretukova on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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