You are part of a group of musicians who meet on Tuesday and Friday evenings to practise in the community hall. You have been told, however, that it is no longer possible for the group to use the hall. Write a letter to the manager. In the letter:

#part #group #musicians #tuesday #friday #evenings #practise #community #hall #manager

Dear Manager, I am writing

this

letter in regards to allowing us for practising in the community hall for music

Change preposition

apply

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which is being stopped due to orders. As we practise in the evening. I am Kim a member of

Correct article usage

the

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musician party, we made

this

group to help young children to learn music when they get stressed out from their long hectic study schedule. Despite

that

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,that

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we are

professional

Add an article

a professional

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musician

Fix the agreement mistake

musicians

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and perform in many events and functions. Our main purpose to practice in society is to provide free music classes and anyone can join that free of cost. If you allow us to practice in the community hall,

then

it hugely benefits

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apply

show examples

our group and children too. We can adjust according to your convenience as you schedule the time and days. I hope you understand our concern and give us positive feedback regarding

this

matter. Yours faithfully, Kim

Submitted by Ritu Joshi on Tue Jun 09 2020

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

149 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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You are part of a group of musicians who meet on Tuesday and Friday evenings to practise in the community hall. You have been told, however, that it is no longer possible for the group to use the hall. Write a letter to the manager. In the letter:

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

The natural resources such as oil, forests and fresh water are being consumed at an alarming rate. What problems does it cause? How can we solve these problems?

Some ex-prisoners commit crimes after being released from prison. What do you think is the cause? How can it be solved?

Some universities now offer their courses on the Internet so that people can study online. Is this a positive or negative development?

One group of people prefer to live in houses that have fewer tall buildings, while others prefer the opposite. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.