These days many children spend a lot of their time playing computer games but little time doing sport. Why is this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays children prefer playing
video
Use synonyms
games to doing some sports in order to spend their leisure time.
This
Linking Words
is due to the factor that
computer
Use synonyms
games give more mental pleasure than any physical activities.
However
Linking Words
, I believe that
this
Linking Words
tendency appears to be negative as it prevents children from healthy life. Many kids are addicted to playing
computer
Use synonyms
games and they consider it as a source of entertainment. But
this
Linking Words
feeling of pleasure cannot be given by sport activities. Doing exercise demands more power and
as a result
Linking Words
, an individual gets tired. Apparently, it can be done for only entertaining purposes as children like to have fun more rather than to tire. In a reverse manner,
video
Use synonyms
games make children to enjoy more because they include a number of activities and options. For
this
Linking Words
reason they are more popular than sports among children. In spite of making children to have fun, spreading of playing
video
Use synonyms
games
instead
Linking Words
of attending to sports does not seem to be a positive improvement to me.
This
Linking Words
is because of the fact that it causes to some mental and health issues. Sitting in front of the
computer
Use synonyms
motionlessly affects to the spine bone and skeletal system. As a consequence, it can be developed scoliosis.
Moreover
Linking Words
, looking at the screen without resting can contribute to worsening of the eyesight since the muscles of the eyestrain. To conclude, sport activities losing their popularity among the youth being replaced with
computer
Use synonyms
games due to the point of view of entertainment. Notwithstanding, I would say that playing
video
Use synonyms
games have detriments and does not make children healthy as sports do.
Submitted by des conocida on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: