IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Write about the following topic: Some people believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn, and should not have to pay tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.

#topic #people #money #tax
In the present scenario,
people
 are putting a lot of
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
show examples
to earn
Change preposition
into earning
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 and
save
Wrong verb form
saving
show examples
 money.
Therefore
, a section of the society believes in keeping the earned income to themselves by not paying any taxes to the nation. Even though they have genuine reasons
behind
Correct pronoun usage
behind it
show examples
, I completely disagree with the
above mentioned
Add a hyphen
above-mentioned
show examples
 notion. Every person prepares
the
Correct article usage
a
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 budget wherein their motive is to save maximum money. There are innumerable reasons behind it; to meet their
over exceeding
Add a hyphen
over-exceeding
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 expenditures; to employ the income into a more lucrative idea or maybe the dissatisfaction of the government.
For example
, in a family of four members wherein only one person is earning he has to work really hard to manage the needs of the family and pay out the taxes. In
such
 a situation they always look for additional income by skipping the tax fee and investing somewhere else. In total,
people
 believe
the
Correct your spelling
that
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non payment
Add a hyphen
non-payment
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 of duty will resolve their financial issues
However
,
on the contrary
, one has to always look at the broader spectrum. The tax amount received by the state is being used for the welfare of the citizens only. The development of the parks and historic buildings, reserves to meet contingencies and many more are being taken care of by them. In some countries, namely Canada, contribution
amount
Correct subject-verb agreement
amounts
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 act as
a
Remove the article
apply
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health insurance to the
people
 and
also
 provide free education in the schools.
Moreover
, it is the moral responsibility of every citizen.
Overall
, in the long
run
Add the comma(s)
run,
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 regular tariff
fee
Fix the agreement mistake
fees
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 will prove fruitful for us only.
To conclude
,
this
 essay
argued
Wrong verb form
argues
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 the need to pay taxes by understanding the perspective of the
people
 refraining
to pay
Change preposition
from paying
show examples
 them. Despite financial issues, I completely disagree with the thought
to skip
Change preposition
of skipping
show examples
 tax
return
Fix the agreement mistake
returns
show examples
 to the government.
Submitted by Jasleen on

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task response
Provide a clearer position in the introduction to clearly state whether you agree or disagree with the statement. This will help the reader understand your perspective from the beginning.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph is linked logically to the next, and that there is a clear overall progression of ideas. Separate the ideas into distinct paragraphs to aid coherence and readability.

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