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IELTS Sample 369 - Majority of children are raised by their grandparents due to the fact that their parents are busy

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Introduction
In
this
Linking Words
 hectic world, living cost is drastically increasing and that necessitates both parents to work hard to earn their daily living.
Moreover
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, parents are concentrating on their career and continue their
jobs even
Accept comma addition
jobs, even
 if they have children. Grandparents are the best choice or perhaps the only choice for
such
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 parents,
although
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 there are some disadvantages. In my opinion raising the children by grandparents is an acceptable fact and has
ignorable
Suggestion
 negative effects.
Body paragraph 1
Obviously, grandparents are the trustworthy caretakers of their grandchildren. Parents can leave their children with them and work with peace of mind. They will feed them and take
care
Use synonyms
 of them same or more than they
care
Use synonyms
 their own children.
In addition
Linking Words
 to that, parents can leave children at their home,
needlessly
Suggestion
needless
 to bring them to any daycare centres.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it saves 20
percentage
Suggestion
percentages
 of family income as additional babysitting or day-
care
Use synonyms
 centre cost is saved. In the case of any minor ailments, grandchildren are cared well by grandparents.
Body paragraph 2
Consistently, grandparents have enormous experiences in
upbringing their
Accept comma addition
upbringing, their
 own children and they are successful parents.
That is
Linking Words
 why they can up-bring their grandchildren as well. They are in many cases better decision makers and
this
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 quality make them ideal to be attached to their grandchildren. Researchers indicate that children brought up
with
Suggestion
by
 the family members learn more values and morality than those who spend their day time in day-
care
Use synonyms
 centre. Grandparents take special
care
Use synonyms
 of their grandchildren and spend the whole day with them and that
do not let
Suggestion
does not let
 the children miss their parents as they would have with a babysitter.
Body paragraph 3
Contradictory, there are some demerits of
this
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 trend
also
Linking Words
.
First
Linking Words
 of all, children raised by the grandparents usually have weaker bonding and relationship with their parents. Children cannot distinguish the parents and grandparents at an early
age which
Accept comma addition
age, which
 is an example of a bad parenting.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the grandparents are in older age and
this
Linking Words
 is the time to rest and relax. In many cases, it is hard for them to take
care
Use synonyms
 of children.
In addition
Linking Words
 generation gap is something that will affect many areas of the development of children.
Conclusion
In conclusion, it is unavoidable in many cases that both parents need to contribute to earning to support the family. Raising children by grandparents is a welcomed trend and that will strengthen the family relationship.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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