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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that employers should ensure a supportive and pleasant work environment where each employee is respected and valued equally while others think employers should focus instead on providing better facilities and equipment . What is your opinion?

#people #employers #work #environment #employee #focus #facilities #equipment
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Some people argue that, employers should consider that, every
employee
 is being valued and respected with a supportive and friendly
environment
 while the others argue that, it is important to providing the facilities and the equipments.
Therefore
, I firmly believe that working in a pleasant
environment
 is much more important than anything in
this
 world. Following essay will explain my viewpoints in detail and
then
 I'll reach to a proper conclusion. Pleasant working
environment
 is important for every
employee
 and employer because of the many benefits.
Firstly
, it can be said that, employees will able to enjoy their work while they can have a good time in with their peer members, which is the main benefit of
this
.
Secondly
, employees will able to develop the self interest in their work and
environment
 and
then
this
 will leads to the
employee
 retention, in the meantime, employees will be loyal to the company and their employers.
Thirdly
, the
employee
 performance
also
 can be improved when working in a happy
environment
.
In addition
 to
this
,
such
 individual performances will help to improve the overall performance of the organisation.
On the other hand
, if the company tends to improve the facilities yet it will not much have a positive effect on the
employee
 performance. Today, many employees are expecting much more than the facilities and the equipments.
For example
, when the employer is praising their staff regularly, will have a positive influence on the
employee
 behaviour.
Besides
, Non material rewards are greatly effected on the
employee
 satisfaction and eventually,
this
 will lead to create a pleasant
environment
 in the working place.
Finally
, to conclude
this
, it can be said that, employees are much happier with friendlier
environment
 than giving them with the much facilities and the equipments. So, I strongly agree with
this
 statement.
Submitted by navi rox on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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