Children nowadays spend a great deal of time watching television. However, television cannot replace the book as a learning tool, which is why children are less well‐educated today. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

It is true that nowadays children spend much
time
in front of the
television but
Accept comma addition
television, but
tv
Suggestion
the tv
is not learning tool as
book
Suggestion
the book
as. While I completely agree with
this
view more
time
is being wasted to watching television, I believe that
tv
programmes contributes to education as well. On the one hand
,
Accept space
,
children tend to
watcht
look attentively
watch
television rather than to read books because
tv
is more comfortable for children.
However
,
Accept space
,
tv
is not an efficient as books and
tv
leads children are
less well
Suggestion
less good
-educated today.
For
example there
Accept comma addition
example, there
is a
tv
every
childrens
Suggestion
children's
house and parents do work a lot in
contemporary world
Suggestion
the contemporary world
.
That is
to mean children are being ignored from parents and developed technology are attracting
children
Accept comma addition
children, such
such
as
tv
,
Accept space
,
telephone and computer.
however they
Accept comma addition
However, they
However they
cannaot
can not
cannot
replace the book as
learning tool
Suggestion
a learning tool
learning tools
On the other hand
,
Accept space
,
tv
is a good
way
to attract children in front of the
tv
.Young boys and girls watch
tv
than elder people. And nowadays
tv
proggrammes
an announcement of the events that will occur as part of a theatrical or sporting event
programmes
programs
are developed
to give lesson
Suggestion
to give a lesson
for children and they interested in
tv
channels namely
Accept comma addition
channels, namely
:
Accept space
:
English for kids and
english
an Indo-European language belonging to the West Germanic branch; the official language of Britain and the United States and most of the commonwealth countries
English
catoons
soft silky fibers from cotton plants in their raw state
cottons
.
Accept space
.
these
Suggestion
These
channels contribute and focus on
children
Suggestion
children's
education.
For
example parents
Accept comma addition
example, parents
are seeking
easy
Suggestion
an easy way
way
to enhance their
children
Suggestion
child's
children's
education and
tv
is one of the best
way
Suggestion
ways
to spend children’s
time
to watching different programmes. In conclusion,
tv
does not compensate as books the precious
time
of children
Accept comma addition
children, but
but it is a good
way
to teach children by online
Submitted by Sardorbek Doniyorov on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Educational tool
  • Documentaries
  • Passive consumption
  • Critical thinking
  • Imagination
  • Attention span
  • Literacy skills
  • Screen time
  • Parental guidance
  • Digital materials
  • Interactive learning
  • Multimedia resources
  • Cognitive development
  • Reading comprehension
  • Balanced approach
What to do next:
Look at other essays: