IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people say that selff-employment is better than a job in a company or an institution. Discus both the views and give your opinion.

#people #selff-employment #job #company #institution #discus
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There exists a controversial notion that self-employment is a much better way of earning one's livelihood than been employed by an organisation. People tend to think differently on a single issue. In my conviction, starting your own venture is not suitable for every individual. For some, working in an institution might be the best option.
This
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 essay would elucidate views on both sections. A start-up might not be as successful as it sees. It requires a great amount of effort, finance and tie-ups. Being an entrepreneur has many advantages and disadvantages.
Firstly
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, the profits a person would earn would be much higher than a salaried worker.
Secondly
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, being your own boss adds to the list.
Furthermore
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,
This
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 requires a great deal of risk to be taken and it might not always end up being successful.
For instance
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, a new enterprise would have to start from the basic like a product creation, promotion strategies, packaging etc. I consider a salaried staff would not require to attend these hustles throughout their work life.
Although
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, finding a job seems to be a difficult path, a few amount of effort can end you in a top multinational company.Self-employment does not entitle one to have a paid leave and fixed income. They are always required in their work environment. But
that is
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 not the case here.
Hence
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, I prefer to work as a paid staff and later on in my life start my own business. In my opinion, the decision depends totally on folks. There has been a considerable increase of small ventures in the past years. Adults tend to opt more of a formal lifestyle as these demands.
Submitted by jerin tomy on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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