Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth rather than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#celebrities #glamour #wealth #achievements #sets #people

Celebrities are often recognised for their stardom and affluence

afore

(old-fashioned) at or from or to a great distance; far

afar

affair

than their accomplishments and

this

results in setting a detrimental example

Suggestion

for

the youngsters. I completely agree

Suggestion

with

this

view due to many reasons which will be discussed

furthermore

this

essay.

Firstly

, future prospects of the young individual is negatively affected because they focus on the status of their favourite celebrity without having the knowledge of the hardships they went through in order to achieve a successful position and fall into the traps of depression because they link success to the outer appearance and possessions that results to failures in their

life

in a run to attain comfort zone without any struggle.

In other words

, they fail to understand that instant stardom does not

last

long and are less likely to opt for hardships

Secondly

, young adults consider money and fame to be the key to success.

This

is the reason why

celebutantes

Suggestion

Celebutantes

have millions of followers on their social networking accounts and the youngsters are the ones who follow their

life style

a manner of living that reflects the person's values and attitudes

lifestyle

and adapt to the materialistic environment by acquiring information about them. Not only that, they are even willing to buy a product endorsed by a celebrity

Accept space

As these juvenile lack experience they easily grasp these things in minds without knowing their

life

background and look ahead to enjoy a luxurious

life

which makes them money oriented rather gaining success through their own efforts or hardships. To conclude, I agree that famous

personality’s

Suggestion

personalities’

takeover

Suggestion

take over

the mindset of young people who spoil their future by trying to imitate them and

consequently

lead an unstable and unsuccessful

life

. (

Submitted by Prisca on Wed Jun 24 2020

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Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

270 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

glamour
wealth
achievements
portrayed
overshadow
influenced
lifestyles
unrealistic
expectations
values
promoting
hard work
perseverance
inspire
positive impact

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Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth rather than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Many people think that it would be beneficial to establish a single, global currency to make international trade and travel much easier. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Would a single currency cause any problems?

Some people think that in order to be successful in business one has to study at university, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Children are now less active in their free time than in the past. Therefore, sports lessons must be compulsory in school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is now possible for scientists and tourists to travel to remote natural environments, such as the South Pole. Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?