Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages.together To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #music #cultures #ages

In our boring life

Accept space

music

can be give

Suggestion

can give

can be given

us rejuvenate,

enyoyment

the pleasure felt when having a good time

enjoyment

and pleasure.

Music

is a one kind of road of

communicated

Suggestion

communicating

as well as connected different community or culture together. In my knowledge based

Accept space

I cannot agree that

music

is a proper

path

something determined in relation to something that includes it

part

of coming people of

variant

Suggestion

varying

cultures and ages together. I considered that

music

Suggestion

amazing

way but

Accept comma addition

way, but

it is not magnificent

way

Firstly

Accept space

There is no doubt that

melody

Suggestion

the melody

can be removed our restless

Accept space

but how song can only superior

way

to add people, culture as well.

they

Suggestion

They

are several of path to together society. For illustrious -qualified behaviour, dynamic personality, honesty and so on can be

tools

Suggestion

tooled

Suggestion

for

add

Suggestion

adding

people not only

way

music

Moreover

song

Suggestion

the song

also

created noise and disturb others. If

refers to the speaker or writer

love

music

it does not mean that everybody loves

music

Secondly

, loud

music

damage our ear

Accept space

as well as

create

Suggestion

creates

amply environment pollution. Like, sound pollution.

Suggestion

the top of that a number of

seriour

concerned with work or important matters rather than play or trivialities

serious

citizens and Islamic mind people

does not pay

Suggestion

do not pay

momentous

this

types of

way

to get connected

Although

music

maked

produced by a manufacturing process

made

market

makes

lot

Suggestion

a lot

problems but

Accept comma addition

problems, but

a specific time

need

Suggestion

needed

to hear

song

Suggestion

the song

a song

For example

a time when we feel alone, we need a company that time

mucis

an artistic form of auditory communication incorporating instrumental or vocal tones in a structured and continuous manner

music

macs

can do

manything

Suggestion

many things

many thing

..Most of the foreigners who don’t know that country Language

thay

people in general

they

also

can feel tune. In

appenance

outward or visible aspect of a person or thing

appearance

penance

Accept space

tune is a better

path get to gether

Suggestion

path to get to gather

path get to gather

path get together

community but

Accept comma addition

community, but

it is need how we utilize in it. In conclusion, I believed that

music

Suggestion

excellent

way but

Accept comma addition

way, but

it is not better for everyone.

Submitted by TwO-PhRaSe- In-a-dAy on Fri Jun 26 2020

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
37Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

257 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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