IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behavior. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #visitors #countries #customs #behavior #host #country #differences
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In our new generation people used to travel more than in the past. Some
nation
Use synonyms
 believes that guests to other
land
Use synonyms
 should follow traditional cultural for that
land
Use synonyms
. At the same time others trend that
host
Use synonyms
country
Use synonyms
 should be
more flexibility
Suggestion
more flexible
 and accept other cultural. I think
travelers
a person who changes location
travellers
 need to follow local traditional rules, so
this
Linking Words
 will help visitors to communicate easily and be
more acceptance
Suggestion
more accepting
from
Suggestion
of
 the local
nation
Use synonyms
. On one hand, most of the individuals fund of travelling around the world, which makes tourism industry become a great investment. Some believe that the
host
Use synonyms
land
Use synonyms
 needs to be acceptance
to
Suggestion
of
 all the cultural differences, as it is part of
business
Suggestion
the business
 and each business has its own positive and negative aspects.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the government of
host
Use synonyms
country
Use synonyms
 needs to teach her pollutions how to respect and accept others. A typical example could be applied for Dubai, as they have a great successful experience to adapt
with
Suggestion
to
 different
cultural
Suggestion
cultures
 in one
country
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some other countries cannot accept or modify their rules to adapt
with
Suggestion
to
 the other
cultural
Suggestion
culture
.
Linking Words
this
Suggestion
This
 could apply
for
Suggestion
to
 the countries with historical religion background. In
such
Linking Words
 countries the
travelers
a person who changes location
travellers
 have to follow the
host
Use synonyms
land
Use synonyms
 trad in our new generation people used to travel more than in the past. Some
nation
Use synonyms
 believes that guests to other
land
Use synonyms
 should follow traditional cultural for that
land
Use synonyms
. At the same time others trend that
host
Use synonyms
country
Use synonyms
 should be
more flexibility
Suggestion
more flexible
 and accept other cultural. I think
travelers
a person who changes location
travellers
 need to follow local traditional rules, so
this
Linking Words
 will help visitors to communicate easily and be
more acceptance
Suggestion
more accepting
from
Suggestion
of
 the local
nation
Use synonyms
. To sum up, I think if anyone decided to go out of his
/
Use synonyms
her own
Use synonyms
country he
Accept comma addition
country, he
 needs to be more attention to his
behavior
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
, as he
/
Use synonyms
she represent his
country
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, Saudi Arabia most of
travelers
a person who changes location
travellers
 go there to visit
holly
a sacred place of pilgrimage
holy
 places,
such
Linking Words
 as Macca. In
this
Linking Words
 location no one can follow his
/
Use synonyms
her traditional
cultural
Suggestion
culture
. To sum up, I think if anyone decided to go out of his
/
Use synonyms
her own
Use synonyms
country he
Accept comma addition
country, he
 needs to be more attention to his
behavior
manner of acting or controlling yourself
behaviour
, as he
/
Use synonyms
she represent his
country
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by hala koraim on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: