Somme people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today's world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history

#somme #people #history #school #subjects #world #science #technology

Historical topics should be included in school subjects to remain the ancients of

past

Suggestion

the past

and their cultures alive. Some people support the above idea.

On the other hand

, some believe that learning brains should be taught

science

and technology because their outcomes will introduce the world with newer and modern inventions. I strongly agree with the later idea of introducing the subjects like

science

and applied

science

in educational sectors.

Furthermore

science

which includes studies about animals, plants, chemicals, physics and

mysteries

Suggestion

the mysteries

behind various things taking place in the surroundings. Apart from those interesting subjects which are full of miracles existing in the world, the history sounds boring to the students who wants to learn creative things as

this

subject is crowded with era's and the names of the rulers and leader, which are difficult to pronounce and memorize.

However

, to some extend, I support the former statement

also

because every culture

do have

Suggestion

does have

their rules, regulation and limitations made by their ancestors and forefathers to be followed.

Hence due

Accept comma addition

Hence, due

to the variety of traditions possessed by diverse communities they seem attractive.

Further more history

Accept comma addition

Furthermore, history

Furthermore history

not only have the information of the leader and the scholars, but it

do store

Suggestion

does store

the scientific information

for example

, the ongoing pandemic situation should be added to the history for the later generations, So that they should be aware of its life threatening circumstances. In conclusion, Everything

do have

Suggestion

does have

importance on its own in learning world. So as per my

perspective these

Accept comma addition

perspective, these

all three subjects should be taught to the students in schools because somewhere in life they may

seems

Suggestion

seem

helpful.

Submitted by Monika Oad on Fri Jul 03 2020

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

267 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Somme people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today's world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think the best way to solve trafic congestion in cities is to provide free public transport 24 hour a day, 7 days a week. Is it good or bad, to what extent do you agree or disagree.

In many societies, there is a growing emphasis on individualism, with people prioritizing their personal goals and desires over collective interests. Is this a positive or negative development?

Cramming and immersion are becomingly increasingly recognised methods of gaining knowledge in an area, other people disagree and say that only through lifelong learning can a subject be learnt. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your position.

More and more people want to buy famous brands of clothes, cars and other items. What are the reasons? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

In many countries, traditional dress and costumes are considered effective ways of maintaining links with the past. How effective can traditional costumes be, in this sense? What other ways exist to help citizens connect with a country’s past?