IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

some people argue that it is the best to accept bab situation, such as unsatisfied factory job or shortage of money. other believe that it is better to try and improve such situations discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #bab #situation #factory #job #shortage #money #situations
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Every human goes through good and bad circumstances in their lives. The society has two opinions about the material drawbacks in activity.
First opinion
Suggestion
The first opinion
 is that accepting of an unsatisfied factory job and less about money.
Second
 view about improving and trying to solve
such
 context. In my point of view, it is not a good decision to accept
such
 setup, and I support the
second
 though. In
this
 statement I will discuss the both views. On the one hand, sometimes people get tired about the minds to work, challenges and survival, because of
this
 they accept the fact that they do not have enough money to live the full activity.
For instance
, maybe disappointed with growth, people, or tired of trying all the time and not getting the desired result. But sometimes some people could lose the opportunity to work, becoming disabled and
then
. Even if activity plays with people and if sometimes luck is not on the person's side, the people should not give up and go through the hard times and challenges. On the other hand
,
Accept space
,
many argued that the best way to tackle a bad circumstance is to try to understand the underlying cause and find a possible solution to improve the situation.
Instead
 of being contained with their unsatisfactory job, they should look for something which they enjoy doing. Sometimes it requires extra effort and fix a goal to achieve the same, but it provides greater rewards.
For instance
, if someone wants to go into managerial roles, they can attend evening MBA courses and will be able to get into. In conclusion, people can sustain by yielding to a disappointing condition, I opine that
instead
 of accepting the fate people should make extra effort to improve the situation in their favour and every individual's destiny is in their own hands, they can build their future, if they will try.
Submitted by Ayaulym on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: