IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

present a written argument to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic: overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones . suggest that government and individuals can tackle these problems . Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.

#argument #reader #specialist #topic #overpopulation #areas #two #ones #government #individuals
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Overpopulation has been the major problem facing most cities of the world. In the recent times, drastic rapid growth in population has led to meteoric rise in
crime
Suggestion
the crime rate
rate
Use synonyms
 and influx of young people from rural areas is believed to be the main factor responsible for
this
Linking Words
 unfortunate trend.
Thus
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 essay will critically examine the negative effect of migration of young people to
cities
Suggestion
the cities
 and likely measures to be taken by
government
Use synonyms
 and individuals to solve
this
Linking Words
 problem. A growing number of research
suggest
Suggestion
suggests
 that increase in crime
rate
Use synonyms
 in most cities is caused by the uncontrolled influx of young graduates to cities after university education to search for job opportunities.
For instance
Linking Words
, in the
last
Linking Words
 decade
,
Accept space
,
 the population of most cities has doubled due to
high
Suggestion
the high rate
rate
Use synonyms
 at which youths from rural areas migrate to urban areas to search for greener pastures. It is believed that
larger proportion
Suggestion
a larger proportion
 of these young graduates resort to crimes for survival as
result
Suggestion
a result
 of failure to secure jobs in the cities. The
government
Use synonyms
 and individuals are
saddle
Suggestion
saddled
 with the responsibilities to solve
this
Linking Words
 problem confronting the cities. The
government
Use synonyms
 is expected to provide
enabling environment
Suggestion
an enabling environment
 for the growth of business in the rural areas by providing infrastructure facilities
such
Linking Words
 as constant electricity supply
,
Accept space
,
 good road network and health care. Young graduates in the rural areas are
also
Linking Words
 to scan their environment
,
Accept space
,
 identify and exploit the opportunities there. They should
also
Linking Words
 acquire skills that will enable to be self- independent
instead
Linking Words
 of searching for non- existent white collar jobs in the cities. In conclusion,
high
Suggestion
the high rate
rate
Use synonyms
 at which young people migrate from rural areas to urban areas has led to increase in crime
rate
Use synonyms
 in the cities
.
Accept space
.
However
Linking Words
, individual and
government
Use synonyms
are
Suggestion
is
 responsible to provide lasting solutions to
this
Linking Words
 unfortunate development.
Submitted by Gulrukh Shodmonkulova on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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