University students often focus on subjects. However, some people think that students also focus on other activities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

University is the place where students get depth information about
subject
Suggestion
the subject
along with practical skills. Some individuals say that students should only focus on teaching,
although
they must enrol in other extracurricular activities said by opponent people. I strongly disagree and say that other curricular activities are being played crucial part of the university experience.
This
essay will emphasize some supportive arguments to my opinion and relevant example. To commence with, there are several arguments which proved that students must participate in other activities.
First
and foremost, educational subjects are not being provided
skills
Suggestion
the skills
of leadership, co-operation with colleagues;
however
,
this
is only
possibled
capable of happening or existing
possible
by
participation
Suggestion
participating
in competitions and other events.
Hence
, by
participation
of events
,
Accept space
,
in
leter
happening at a time subsequent to a reference time
later
latter
life, a layman will not face problems during work with
opposite gender
Suggestion
the opposite gender
and express their idea with others.
For example
, according to Mumbai university, over 95% of leaders has been developed by
participation
Suggestion
participating
in events in school or college period. There is one more supportive argument,
besides
this
, spending most of times with books can be the possible reason of increased stress level, so that by other curricular activities, pupils can acquire refresh mind and elevate concentration level
;
Accept space
;
therefore
, they will focus on
study
Suggestion
the study
as well as other routine activities.
For instance
, students has concentrate more if they can participate in other competitions; said by Dr.Vikash shah
(
Accept space
(
doctor of brain hospital (Delhi)). Apart from above all mention arguments, there is one argument, which support to alternative view. The most profound one is, by giving more importance to other recreational activities, students who cannot concentrate on their
study
Suggestion
studies
and feel hesitation during
exam
Suggestion
the exam
an exam
exams
;
therefore
, they are being
getted
come into the possession of something concrete or abstract
got
gotten
cheated
lower grade
Suggestion
a lower grade
lower grades
in
study
Suggestion
the study
and open the door of unsuccessful life.
For example
, according to Mumbai university, over 35% of pupils in India, had not been focusing on
study
due to
enrollment
in other activities. Henceforth to conclude, it is clear that with
help
Suggestion
the help
of extracurricular activity, pupils can more focus on
study
and develop some important skills like leadership, cooperation, whist by
participation
, they lost concentration in
study
Suggestion
the study
studies
. I strongly say that extra activities play a crucial role in
students
Suggestion
student
students'
student's
life.
Submitted by herry on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: