A lot of people who wanted to become professional athletes gave up this idea because of the fear of failure and parent’s pressure. Do you think that parents should support their children who want to do a career in sports? Support your point of view with relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

#people #athletes #idea #fear #failure #parent’s #pressure #parents #support #children #career #sports #point

Becoming a professional athlete is a whole life dream of people who love

sport

Suggestion

sports

However

, fear of failure and especially pressure from

parent

are the main walls between many people and their dream. I personally think that

parent

Suggestion

parents

a parent

should be the one who

support

their children to pursue the

career

in sports as

parent

play the most important role

Suggestion

the kid’s decision on continuing or quitting their

career

roadmap. There are plenty reasons for

parent

Suggestion

parents

a parent

the parent

to not

support

their children to follow athletic

career

, mainly come from the concern of

uncertain future

Suggestion

an uncertain future

. The job market has become very competitive as it is, even with the university qualification.

Therefore

parent

tend to influence their children to pursue studying roadmap rather than

sport

career

Besides

, all sports require

high level

Suggestion

a high level

of commitment, dedication and long-time practices and with extreme discipline.

As a result

, most of young

sport

talents in high schools

finally

have decided to go to university to become a teacher, doctor or a banker after graduated

instead

. Despite the aforementioned concerns of parents, I would contend that

parent

should

support

their

sport

-gifted children to reach higher performances and achievements or even to boost their kids’ confidence to overcome the fear of failure. These parents are the ones who provide the

first

opportunity to live up with

sport

Suggestion

the sport

and to give motivations during the athletic

career

of their kids. There are many successful stories of athlete stars with significant involvement of family

support

For example

, Dang Van Lam, the famous goalkeeper of

Vietnam National Football team

Suggestion

the Vietnam National Football team

has shared that his success is contributed by two key factors: his endless love

Suggestion

for

football and his family’s

support

by sending him to learn at

Spartak football club

Suggestion

a Spartak football club

the Spartak football club

in Moscow when he was a child. Another athletic success

are

Suggestion

Williams sisters, Serena Williams and Venus Williams. They have started playing tennis when they were kids and they are ranking at top 1 tennis players in the world now. In conclusion, while there are still some concerns of

parent

about insecure future, the

sport

-gifted kids could greatly achieve more success with less effort if they luckily

have

Suggestion

has

the accompany and encouragement of their family.

Submitted by Love Beauty99 on Thu Jul 09 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

360 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

It is now possible for scientists and tourists to travel to remote areas with natural environments, such as the South Pole. Is this a positive or negative development?

Modern use of communication have reduced the amount of time for people to interact. This has negative impacts on social lives of people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children why mothers go out to work

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.