IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #information #research #business #world
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Sharing
information
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 helps people to build their
knowledge
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. Certain people believe that exchanging
information
Use synonyms
 related to scientific research, business and the academic world
is
Suggestion
are
 important, whereas others think that there is no need to share some of the valuable
information
Use synonyms
 freely. One evident benefit of exchanging
information
Use synonyms
 helps a
person
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 to expand his
knowledge
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. Every
person
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 does not have every
information
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 on a
subject but
Accept comma addition
subject, but
 when we exchange details our
knowledge
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 expands manifold. To illustrate, a
person
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 preparing for his exam by doing group study, will know more about the subject in less time than a
person
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 studying individually.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, sharing
information
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that is
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 valuable and important can lead you in serious situations as you don't know whether the other
person
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 is trustworthy or not.
For instance
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, there was a case recently where a
person
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 working on a scientific formula shared his theory with his group, one of the
member
Suggestion
members
 of that group used
this
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information
Use synonyms
 for his own benefit and sold that formula. To conclude, sharing
information
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 is a key to expand one's
Use synonyms
knowledge but
Accept comma addition
knowledge, but
this
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 may
also
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 result in passing on some of the salient details
.
Accept space
.
 In my opinion, people must ensure what
information
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 are
least valuable
Suggestion
less valuable
 and would not affect anyone if they are shared, only
such
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 details need to be shared
insted
in place of, or as an alternative to
instead
 of
whole thing
Suggestion
the whole thing
. In
this
Linking Words
 way, one is able to expand his
knowledge
Use synonyms
 without any serious complications.
Submitted by Rhythm Vohra on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
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