IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Some say that self-employment is better than working in a company or in an institution. Discuss both views. What's your opinion on this?

#say #self-employment #company #institution
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as
business
Use synonyms
 fields have become complicated,
people
Use synonyms
 try to find the fittest working style for their
business
Use synonyms
. and there are
people
Use synonyms
 who say that self-employment is better than working in a company. first of all, self-employment will
return
Verb problem
result
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with
Change preposition
in
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 higher income. because most of
Add an article
the
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profit from selling products will be owners and there is no limit.
secondly
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 who run their own
Use synonyms
business
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
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 learn a lot from their work. because they would deal with lots of
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
 that employees could never experience.
however
Linking Words
, self-employment is risky
in
Change preposition
from
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financial
Correct article usage
a financial
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 view. because it is necessary to invest money to start and maintain the
business
Use synonyms
 and no one would guarantee their decision. the
ower
Correct your spelling
owner
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 should take all responsibility.
Capitalize word
On
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on the other hand
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 who
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 working in
company
Add an article
the company
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 will get specialized skill in their field. because employees are assigned
Linking Words
in
Change preposition
to
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particular
Add an article
a particular
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 part and concentrate on their own part. and they can live with
stable
Add an article
a stable
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 salary.
as
Capitalize word
As
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 long as they do their job, their salary is guaranteed.
however
Linking Words
, their salary is lower and limited.
Submitted by Luna Jung on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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