IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

University education is essential for young people

#university #education #people
Nowadays almost all teenagers are provided with an opportunity to enter a university. While some people feel that earning a degree is crucial in our times, others believe that there are different ways to achieve success in life for the youth. In my opinion, getting a university diploma is essential for anyone who can afford it. To start with, higher education broadens one's mind as all applicants are going to learn various subjects and deal with complex ideas.
Furthermore
, a busy learning schedule requires students to be disciplined and
therefore
 may be considered as a challenge for many of them.
On the other hand
, some people claim that higher education is too expensive for families with low incomes.
Therefore it
Accept comma addition
Therefore, it
 is not worth its price and the young should start working as soon as they can to earn enough money and experience.
Nonetheless
, I do not support
this
 argument. The career opportunities provided by universities are tremendous.
Moreover
, educational loans and grants are available for
this
 type of students. All things considered, I feel that entering a university is a thing that cannot be replaced with working experience. Not only will the young people gain many useful skills, but
also
 enrich their knowledge.
Submitted by Анна Василева on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: