Some people believe that sport has an important role in society. Others, however, feel that it is nothing more than a leisure activity for some people.

Nowadays there
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
been positive effects that
sport
has gained inhabitants of society.
Whereas
, some
people
argue that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sport
is not
essential
Add an article
an essential
show examples
part of our life it needs for leisure activities.    first of all, it is undeniable
facts
Fix the agreement mistake
fact
show examples
that there are some reasons why 
sport
 is vital in society. One of the reasons is that
people
can be healthier
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
than ever before. For
this
reason
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
doctors are always recommending to
people
occupied with various types of sports like running, walking,
hiking
Correct word choice
and hiking
show examples
. Another reason is more injured inhabitants
more
Add a missing verb
have more
show examples
problem for
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
to cure them so
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
do not need
waste
Fix the infinitive
to waste
show examples
money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
injured residents in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
free hospital.  
Obesit
Correct your spelling
Obesity
, heart attack, today has 
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
 decreased significantly
through
Change preposition
throughout
show examples
the world because of 
sport
. These days young generations often tend to sedentary activities
such
as playing computer games
instead
of
this
parent
Fix the agreement mistake
parents
show examples
encourage their children to do
sport
Wrong verb form
sports
show examples
the
Correct word choice
so the
show examples
children can improve their social interaction with peers.    on the other hand, some 
people
 think the 
sport
 is nothing more than
Add an article
a
show examples
leisure activity. It is true that
sport
can count
like
Change preposition
as
show examples
Correct article usage
an
show examples
activity. 
Therefore
, not all
people
can be professional sports
player
Fix the agreement mistake
players
show examples
so a lot of
people
do
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
when they want to relax or calm down.   In conclusion, some
people
believe
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sport
is leisure activity
whereas
, I think
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sport
is plays
Wrong verb form
play
show examples
important
Correct article usage
an important
show examples
role in society
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • national unity
  • physical health
  • mental health
  • social change
  • gender equality
  • social integration
  • disadvantaged communities
  • cultural barriers
  • escapism
  • commercialization
  • viewership
  • merchandise sales
  • inclusivity
  • accessibility
  • nationalistic fervor
  • racism
  • marginalization
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