IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

People nowadays sleep less than they used to do in the past. What are the causes? What are the effects?

#people #effects
It is no secret people are more reluctant to sleep than they were in the past. In my opinion, it is irrevocably linked to an addiction to social media, which can trigger some detrimental effects,
such
 as mental and physical disorders. .The main contributory factor that I would suggest is attributed to increased use of social networking websites. To be more specific, people spending their time on Facebook and Instagram have to go to bed too late. Some of them even have set their businesses via their social media accounts, allowing them to work tirelessly from dawn to dusk. A good example of
this
 is promotion managers who work with many companies in various countries in varied time zones by working on their marketing affairs through Facebook and Instagram. Their sleep time is sometimes reduced to 2-3 hours a day. As far as the dire consequences are concerned, those who sleep less risk their mental health.
In other words
, they are likely to be insomniac, struggling with sleep deprivation.
In addition
, sleeplessness can take a toll on physical health.
For instance
, blood circulation and metabolism might be jeopardized. Overall, no one can doubt that individuals used to sleep in the past more than they do today. What I believe is that social network is the major cause of it that can contribute to health issues in people in no uncertain terms. Given
this
 situation, it is recommended people regulate their sleep hours by arranging their work-life balance to avoid the deleterious impact of it.
Submitted by RUSTAM on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: