IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8.5

It is inevitable that traditional cultures will be lost as technology develops. Technology and traditional cultures are incompatible. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

#cultures #technology
Nowadays, humanity is becoming developed, and there is no denying the fact that
this
 phenomenon changes the culture and habits of some communities.
Although
 over-reliance on technology may cause that traditional customs become forgotten, in
this
 essay, I will investigate whether technological advancements are able to coexist with historical tradition. On the one hand, most traditional actions became outdated in that they have been replaced by electrical appliances.
For instance
, festivals in Spain, where people congregate to prepare a certain type of food
such
 as tomato sauce are no longer held inasmuch as the respective fruits are processed in factories.
In addition
,
this
 brings greater benefit as it could be conducted the whole year by professional workers not only once a year by inexperienced people. Turning to the other side of the argument, traditional cultures emerged from a set of values that are still passed from generation to generation. In fact, if they were forgotten, many nations would lose their identity and would no longer recognisable in the world.
Moreover
, distinctive features of specific countries could be used as an advertisement to encourage tourists to visit their state. Japan is a good example of land
that is
 able to earn money by selling their cultural heritage to visitors, and at the same time they have a high level of technological development. All things considered, in my view, culture and technology need to be interlocked in that country is not able to reach their full economic unless they are connected.
Furthermore
, without its history, the state loses its soul and becomes only a spot on the map which may lead to regression, not development.
Submitted by Azadeh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: