Some people believe that sport is an essential part of school life for children, while others feel it should be purely optional. Discuss these opposing views and give your own opinion.

#people #sport #part #school #life #children

Many think that sport is most important part of

school curriculum

Suggestion

the school curriculum

;

however

other

plural of other; the people or things not already mentioned

others

say it should be

choose

Suggestion

chosen

according to interest. While there are some reasons for not taking it

serious

Suggestion

seriously

subject

Suggestion

a subject

, but the advantages are far more if it is

compulsory

Suggestion

a compulsory subject

subject

. On the one hand, sports are totally wastage of time. The crucial time during exams should be devoted only on studying subjects for scoring better percentage.

Furthermore

, there is not better career opportunities in

this

field as many scams like IPL auctions are hit

listed

Suggestion

list

lists

Secondly better

Accept comma addition

Secondly, better

facilities or quotas are not given by government

for

Suggestion

the players in many countries.

On the other hand

, sports help individuals to become a better version of themselves.

Firstly it

Accept comma addition

Firstly, it

is important for mental and physical health of pupils because it creates the competitive spirit in them.

Secondly sports

Accept comma addition

Secondly, sports

like hockey and football teaches cooperation skills and team work which is most important in today’s professional world.

Moreover it

Accept comma addition

Moreover, it

generates the leadership skills which

Suggestion

are

effective in

decision making process

Suggestion

the decision making process

. In my opinion, it should be a compulsory

subject

in the school syllabus. Studying

this

subject

teenagers develop the valuable qualities which helps them to confront the problems and provide confidence for survival in

this

competitive world. To summarise

this

, while other subjects are absolutely an essential part of career building, sports are

also

crucial for growth. Games provide strong stamina and healthy lifestyle.

Moreover

, it provides the practical experiences which

plays

Suggestion

play

a crucial role in the life of an individual.

Submitted by anu gill on Thu Jul 30 2020

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
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Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

252 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that sport is an essential part of school life for children, while others feel it should be purely optional. Discuss these opposing views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Thesedays, problems with pollution are becoming worse, particularly in large cities. What are the reasons for this and how can this be solved? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The exploration and development of safe alternatives to fossil fuel should be the most important global priority today. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. Do you agree or disagree?

Detailed description of crimes on newspaper and TV can have bad consequences on society, so this kind of information should be restricted on media. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some way.