Some people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school subjects. But, others believe that teenagers should focus on the subject that they are best at or that they find the most interesting. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The

subject

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of how to optimise school curriculum comes up frequently, where certain people feel that students should

study

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a broad curriculum, whereas others maintain that students are better served by focusing their efforts on subjects in which they perform best or are most interested in. The benefits and downsides of both viewpoints, as well as my own opinion, are discussed below.

Firstly

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, those who believe that teenagers should focus on subjects they are best at or most interested in have valid points. One strong supporting argument is that if young academics focus on subjects they perform well in, they can focus on and deepen their knowledge in a specific

subject

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, and be better prepared for a future career in that discipline.

For example

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, if a

student

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excels at and loves woodworking,

then

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focussing on attaining woodworking excellence will provide them with a significant advantage over generalist students upon entry into the workforce.

Additionally

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, focus on subjects of interest can allow for an earlier graduation and provide a head start into

further

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study

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or the workforce.

Lastly

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, if students

study

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subjects they truly enjoy, they may be generally happier and less stressed, thereby improving their overall educational experience.

However

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, there are those who believe there are benefits to a broader curriculum.

In contrast

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to supporting a focussed approach, there are those who believe the best approach is for students to

study

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a wider range of subjects. The rationale for students attaining a broader

education

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is based on providing teenagers with potential to switch from one potential life path to another. An example of

this

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is where a

student

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may be very interested in painting early on in their

education

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however towards

Accept comma addition

however, towards

the end of middle school, their interest shifts to biochemistry. Without having laid the basic groundwork in both biology and chemistry, that

student

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will find it difficult to change direction and pursue a tertiary

education

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in their new favourite

subject

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This

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switch in future direction is a likely scenario, as young adults tend to change their minds quite often.

Further

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, a broader

education

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can make it easier for students to become more integrated members of society, in being able to understand the context of a broad range of occurrences, from science to the arts.

Lastly

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, my opinion is a combination of both views. I believe that while teenagers should have the opportunity to deepen their understanding in the subjects they naturally gravitate towards, they should

also

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gain a base understanding of a broader range of subjects. While following your passion can ultimately lead to better focus and potentially better results in school and in the workforce, having at least a base understanding of other subjects will allow teenagers to function more effectively as a member of our sophisticated and multi-faceted society. In summary, there are good arguments to support a young person's pursuit of either an

education

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based on their interests, or a broader spectrum, more general learning path. Supporters of the selected educational approach believe that when a

student

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focusses on what they love, they will achieve superior results, whereas those in favour of a generalist

education

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believing students have better options for future career changes. I believe that students should focus on what they love, but should

also

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supplement their most loved

subject

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with a basic understanding of other areas.

marcin.malek

Aug 6, 2020

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

553 words

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Some people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school subjects. But, others believe that teenagers should focus on the subject that they are best at or that they find the most interesting. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Cases of bullying in school are increasing and worsening. What do you think are the causes of this? How can we tackle this issue?

Some people think that museums and art galleries should concentrate on the works of their own countries instead of the works of art from other parts of the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Around the world it is likely that more adults will work from and more children will study from home as computer technology become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think it is a negative or a positive development?