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Band 4

Women are better at childcare than men therefore they should focus more on raising children and less on their working life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#women #childcare #men #focus #children #life
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Some people claim that women are more adept in
children
Suggestion
child
care
Use synonyms
 and they must concentrate on it rather than work and career. I am partly фпккн with
this
Linking Words
 point of view, but
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
 do not think that women have to make
this
Linking Words
 choice  between family and job.I hardly believe, in our modern society couples can
care
Use synonyms
 about their children together.These days in some countries and cultures we can still see that women usually
care
Use synonyms
 about children's food and cleaning.
For
Linking Words
instance in
Accept comma addition
instance, in
Soudi
of or relating to Saudi Arabia or its people
Saudi
 Arabia women cannot work without permission from her husband or father. In my country, Russia we
also
Linking Words
 have a
lots
Suggestion
lot
 of discrimination,
ferstly
before anything else
firstly
 women has
les
used to form the comparative of some adjectives and adverbs
less
led
salory
Suggestion
,
Linking Words
secondly they
Accept comma addition
secondly, they
  rarely can be a manager and
finally
Linking Words
, company often prefer to hire men.At the same time in the
first
Linking Words
 world country
such
Linking Words
 as the United States, Germany and The United Kingdom we may notice absolutely different situations. As we can see, women have all rights as men, they can
woit
stay in one place and anticipate or expect something
wait
vote
, be whatever they want to be, they even have a possibility to be a president.  According to
this
Linking Words
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
 would say that nowadays we are equal and we do not have to choose between work and having a baby.  In Holland there is a really nice program where men can
also
Linking Words
 have the holidays to
care
Use synonyms
 for their child in his
first
Linking Words
 few months.   I strongly believe that lots of country getting more and more equal and people like it, it is no
metter
a vaguely specified concern
matter
mater
matters
 who you are, what is your sex, and what is your skin colour we all humans. T believe that both parents have to
care
Use synonyms
 about the baby and support each other.
Submitted by Irina on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender roles
  • nurturing
  • empathy
  • sensitivity
  • maternal instinct
  • paternal involvement
  • child's development
  • work-life balance
  • gender equality
What to do next:
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